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Many breastfed toddlers continue to wake at night to nurse. While some toddlers naturally give up night feeds on their own, others need encouragement and sleep training from parents to sleep through the night. With patience, consistency and by following best practices, you can help your breastfed toddler learn to sleep through the night.
When Can You Expect a Breastfed Baby to Sleep Through the Night?
Most babies, including those who are breastfed, don’t consistently sleep through the night without waking until around 6 months of age. However, every baby is different. Some babies begin sleeping for longer stretches earlier, while others continue waking to feed multiple times per night well beyond 6 months.
Generally, here is the timeline for when you can expect your breastfed baby to reach different sleep milestones:
- 3-4 months: Sleeps 4-6 hour stretches
- 4-6 months: Sleeps 6-8 hour stretches
- 6-9 months: Sleeps through the night regularly
Keep in mind that even after your baby starts sleeping through the night, regressions and disruptions to sleep are common. Illness, developmental leaps, growth spurts, changes to daily routine and schedule disruptions can all interfere with nighttime sleep.
Why Does My Breastfed Toddler Still Wake at Night?
While many babies are sleeping through the night by 9-12 months, some breastfed toddlers continue waking regularly, even past their first birthday. There are a few reasons why:
Nutrition
Breastmilk continues to be an important source of nutrition for toddlers up until age two and beyond. Some toddlers wake out of a biological need to feed and get that added nutrition overnight. This is especially true during growth spurts.
Comfort
Nursing to sleep and feeding through the night is comforting and familiar to your toddler. The sucking motion is soothing. Even if they don’t need the milk itself, the act of nursing brings your toddler comfort.
Sleep Associations
If your toddler is used to falling asleep at the breast and only goes back to sleep with nursing sessions overnight, then they haven’t learned to self-soothe. They rely on nursing to connect their sleep cycles. This becomes a sleep association or sleep crutch.
Sleep regressions
Major physical and mental developmental leaps occur during the toddler years. These developmental milestones, like learning to walk or talk, can interfere with sleep. Separation anxiety and sleep regressions are also common around 12-18 months.
Teething discomfort
Teething pain can wake your toddler and make nursing comforting. Molars especially tend to emerge around 12-18 months and can disrupt sleep patterns.
Illness
Sickness, pain from ear infections, congestion, cough and runny nose can all lead to more frequent night waking in toddlers.
Tips to Help Your Breastfed Toddler Sleep Through the Night
If your breastfed toddler is waking frequently and you want to encourage longer stretches of sleep, try these tips:
Ensure daytime nutrition needs are met
Make sure your toddler is getting enough calories, iron and other nutrients during daytime feeding and meals. Aim for 3 solid food meals and 2-3 nutritious snacks per day. This helps reduce the biological need to wake at night to nurse.
Develop a consistent, age-appropriate bedtime routine
Bath, book, song, lights out – a predictable, soothing bedtime routine signals to your toddler that it’s time to sleep. This consistency helps regulate the body’s production of melatonin to make falling asleep easier.
Set an appropriate bedtime
Make sure your toddler isn’t overtired at bedtime, but also avoid putting them to bed too early. Watch for sleepy cues like eye rubbing and crankiness. An age-appropriate bedtime is between 6-8 pm for most toddlers.
Allow time for nursing, not nursing to sleep
Nurse before bed, but try to end the nursing session at least 20 minutes before putting your toddler into the crib fully awake. This helps break the sleep association.
Phase out night feeds gradually
Sudden weaning is difficult for breastfed toddlers. Phase out one feeding every 5-7 nights as a gradual process. Replace with water or just soothing without nursing.
Delay response time
When your toddler stirs at night, allow 5-7 minutes before responding to allow a chance for them to settle back to sleep independently. You can increase this over time.
Limit distractions and noise
Make sure the sleep environment is dark, cool and comfy. Use white noise to block out disruptive household sounds. Limit nightlights if possible.
Give love but avoid stimulating interaction
Briefly pause, hug and reassure your toddler when entering to resettle them, but avoid turning lights on, changing diapers, playing, singing and prolonged conversation.
Consider modifying your own sleep schedule
If your toddler is used to feeding multiple times per night, consider going to bed earlier yourself or taking naps so you can function after the frequent wakings. As their sleep consolidates, you can adjust your schedule.
Seek help from your pediatrician
If frequent night wakings persist beyond 18 months or you are concerned about your child’s sleep, talk to your pediatrician. They can check for any underlying health issues interfering with sleep.
Ask for support from your partner or others
Sleep training and night weaning is difficult. Having your partner or another caregiver take over some of the resettling at night can provide you with a break.
What is Normal Toddler Sleep?
Here’s an overview of normal sleep patterns for toddlers:
12-18 Months
- 2 naps per day with total sleep of 12-14 hours
- Naps last 1-3 hours
- Night sleep of 10-12 hours
- Waking 1-2 times per night is common
18-24 Months
- 1 nap per day with total sleep of 12-14 hours
- Naps last 1-2 hours
- Night sleep of 11-12 hours
- Most toddlers sleep through the night consistently
2-3 Years
- No nap or short 30-60 minute nap
- Night sleep of 11-13 hours
- Sleep through the night regularly
Keep in mind that up to 20% of healthy toddlers don’t reliably sleep through the night even by age 2. While frustrating, some toddlers just need more time to develop those skills.
How Long Can It Take to Night Wean a Breastfed Toddler?
Night weaning a breastfed toddler is a gradual process. It can take anywhere from 2 weeks to 6 months for your child to wean from all night feeds and sleep through until morning.
The speed of the process depends on factors like:
- Your child’s age
- How reliant they are on feeding to get back to sleep
- How flexible they are with changes
- How gradually you phase out the feedings
- How consistent you are with the process
- Whether teething, illness or travel disrupt the process
The most important things are persistence, consistency and patience. With a gentle, loving approach, your breastfed toddler can learn new ways to be soothed at night.
Tips for Night Weaning a Breastfed Toddler
Here are some tips to help the night weaning process go more smoothly:
Pick a low-stress time
Avoid starting night weaning during other disruptions like a recent move, new sibling, vacation or parental absence. Wait until your routine is stable.
Explain the changes
Verbal toddlers can understand explanations about the differences between night and day feeding. Books and stories can help.
Compensate with daytime feeding
Increase daytime nursing and offer more solid food and fluids to reduce night hunger.
Go slowly
Dropping one feeding every 5-7 nights allows gradual adjustment. Quick weaning can lead to engorged breasts and frustration.
Time feedings
Nurse for a set length of time at night feeds before unlatching your drowsy, but awake toddler. Gradually decrease the time.
Try alternative comforts
Offer water, a snack or a lovey/stuffed animal for snuggles as a substitute for nursing.
Recruit help
Have someone else respond to your toddler’s night wakings to avoid giving in to the breastfeeding request.
Give lots of praise and affection
Encourage the progress your toddler makes and let them know you are proud of their big kid sleep skills!
What if Night Weaning Doesn’t Work?
Some breastfed toddlers struggle to give up night feeds completely. If you’ve tried all the tips consistently for 4-6 months without success, then it may help to:
- Get an evaluation for sleep disorders like sleep apnea
- Discuss any pain, reflux, allergies or illness interfering with sleep
- Try a formal sleep training method with your pediatrician’s guidance
- Consider weaning completely if night nursing remains extremely frequent
- Accept that your toddler needs more time to develop night weaning skills
- Focus on your own coping strategies to handle the frequent wakings
While frustrating, remember that night waking will pass eventually. Stay consistent, get support when you need it, and know you are giving your toddler the comfort they still need overnight.
Sleep Training a Breastfed Toddler
Sleep training uses strategic techniques to help toddlers learn to fall asleep independently without feedings, rocking or other sleep crutches. Here are some methods:
Gradual Retreat
Sit next to crib at first, then move chair farther away over weeks as toddler falls asleep faster independently.
Camping Out
Place a mattress or chair next to toddler’s crib and sit with them as they fall asleep, gradually moving farther away.
Modified Ferber
Allow short check-ins at gradually increasing intervals to reassure toddler while letting them self-soothe to sleep.
Wake to Sleep
Wake your toddler 30 minutes before bedtime feeding ends, keep them awake briefly, then put back down awake to reinforce self-soothing.
Pick Up/Put Down Method
Pick toddler up when fussy but put back in crib awake while reassuring them. Repeat as needed.
Talk to your pediatrician before starting formal sleep training to rule out any physical or behavioral issues interfering with sleep. Only use sleep training methods you feel comfortable with. Respond right away if your toddler becomes sick or hurt.
Handling Night Wakings with a Sleep Trained Toddler
Once sleep trained, most toddlers sleep through the night by 15-18 months. But handling night wakings when they do occur is important:
- Use the same settling techniques from bedtime like brief check-ins or pick up/put down.
- Keep room dark, white noise on, interaction minimal.
- Don’t immediately respond by feeding, turning on lights or playing.
- Let your toddler self-soothe with security object or self-talk for 5-10 minutes first.
- If wakings last for 30 minutes or more, you can do a quick feed then resettle.
- Keep responses extremely boring, predictable and brief.
Following the same routine reinforces desired sleep habits. Your toddler will learn over time to go back to sleep independently.
How to Cope with Frequent Night Wakings as a Parent
Frequent night waking to breastfeed a toddler is exhausting. Here’s how to take care of yourself:
Communicate needs with your partner
Be honest about your need for rest. Negotiate night and morning duties fairly.
Sleep when baby sleeps
Nap during daytime when your toddler does, even if you don’t sleep. The rest helps.
Ask for help
Call on family or friends to cover a night shift or childcare during the day so you can sleep.
Lower standards
Don’t worry about a perfect house. Order takeout. Let go of non-essentials. Do the minimum needed.
Practice self-care
Shower, get fresh air, move your body and eat well. Carve out small actions that replenish you.
Connect with other moms
Find community with moms going through the same thing. Share tips and empathy.
Remember it’s temporary
The phase of frequent night wakings won’t last forever. Your child is building skills.
Talk to your doctor if needed
If you’re struggling with exhaustion, depression or anxiety, seek professional mental health support.
Hang in there! With time and consistency, restful nights will return. But don’t hesitate to ask your pediatrician for help if you need it.
FAQs About Breastfeeding and Night Waking
Is it OK to night wean a breastfed toddler?
Yes, as long as it’s done gradually over time. Night weaning is appropriate once a toddler is over 12 months and eating sufficient solids during the day. Talk to your pediatrician if you have concerns.
What age do breastfed babies sleep through the night?
Most breastfed babies sleep through the night around 6 months but it’s normal up until 9-12 months. Many breastfed toddlers continue waking to feed at night past 1 year old.
Does breastmilk have sleeping hormones?
Breastmilk contains melatonin and other compounds that promote sleepiness. Nighttime breastmilk may contain higher levels to encourage longer stretches of sleep.
Should I night wean if I’m pregnant or tandem nursing?
You may want to consider night weaning while pregnant to allow your body more rest. Tandem nursing an infant and toddler can also make sleep training very difficult.
Will night weaning affect my milk supply?
Dropping night feeds may lead to a temporary dip in supply as your body adjusts. Daytime nursing and pumping can help compensate for this during the transition.
What if my toddler cries hysterically when I try night weaning?
Some toddlers strongly protest the changes. If your toddler becomes extremely upset or refuses to eat or sleep, you may need to pause the process and try again in a few weeks when they are less resistant.
Why does my toddler wake crying at night but settles with nursing?
Your toddler has associated feeding with going back to sleep. Even if they aren’t hungry, the ritual and comfort of nursing helps them settle.
Can I night wean if my toddler is reverse cycling?
Reverse cycling when baby takes more feedings at night can make night weaning extra hard. You’ll need to very gradually shift those feedings earlier in the 24-hour period.
Conclusion
While frequent wakings to breastfeed can be exhausting for parents, night weaning a lovingly-attached toddler takes time, consistency and patience. Approach the process gradually and age-appropriately. Seek support when you need it. Remember that this too shall pass as your toddler’s sleep skills progress. Both you and your toddler will be better rested before you know it!