Using a napkin properly at the dinner table is an important etiquette skill. There are many dos and don’ts when it comes to napkin etiquette that everyone should know. In the opening paragraphs, we’ll provide a quick overview of some of the key things you should not do with your napkin during a meal.
Do Not Blow Your Nose on the Napkin
One of the biggest napkin faux pas is using it as a tissue to blow your nose. Napkins are for wiping your mouth and hands delicately, not for catching nasal secretions. Blowing your nose at the table into a napkin is unhygienic and impolite. Always excuse yourself from the table if you need to blow your nose and use a tissue instead.
Do Not Tuck It Into Your Shirt
Some people mistakenly tuck their dinner napkin into their shirt collar to protect their clothes from spills and drips. However, this is considered inappropriate table manners. Napkins should be neatly placed in your lap or resting on the table. Tucking it into your shirt is too casual for formal dining.
Do Not Use It as a Towel
Napkins should not be used as a substitute for a towel. You should not use your dinner napkin to wipe or dry your face, hair, hands, or anything else. The napkin is meant to delicately blot your mouth. Using it as a makeshift towel to clean up messes is not proper etiquette.
Do Not Twist, Crunch, or Play with It
It’s impolite to fidget with your napkin at the table by twisting, crunching, folding, playing, or fanning yourself with it. The napkin should lay neatly in your lap until you need to use it. Then replace it neatly back in your lap. Fidgeting with the napkin suggests boredom or nervousness.
Do Not Use as a Tablecloth
Your napkin belongs in your lap, not spread out over the table as a makeshift tablecloth. Placing your napkin flat on the table is appropriate only at very casual meals where you don’t have a tablecloth. In formal settings, it should always stay in your lap when not in use.
In-Depth Explanation of Napkin Etiquette Rules
Now let’s explore the do’s and don’ts of napkin etiquette in more detail. Learning and following these guidelines demonstrates good manners and class.
Proper Placement
The proper placement for your napkin depends on the formality of the meal:
- Formal dinners: Place the folded napkin in your lap once you are seated.
- Informal dinners: You may place the napkin to the left of your plate if you wish.
- Extremely casual settings: It’s acceptable to neatly place your napkin flat on the table to the left of your plate.
At formal meals, wait until the host/hostess unfolds their napkin before placing yours in your lap.
Using Your Napkin
When using your napkin during the meal:
- Lightly dab or blot your lips between bites, don’t rub or wipe.
- Use your napkin to gently blot oil or sauces from the corners of your mouth.
- Fold your napkin to use a clean spot as needed.
- Never use your napkin to wipe your forehead or as a tissue.
- Place soiled napkins on the table or plate, not back in your lap.
Napkin Etiquette for Different Foods
Certain foods call for special napkin etiquette:
- Soup: Blot your lips before lifting the spoon to your mouth so it doesn’t drip.
- Bread: Never wipe crumbs onto your napkin. Use your finger to brush them into your palm.
- Finger foods: Always wipe fingers before picking up your napkin.
- Beverages: Blot with the napkin if your drink drips down the glass onto your hands.
End of Meal Napkin Etiquette
At the end of the meal:
- Loosely place your used napkin to the left side of your plate, don’t refold it.
- In formal settings, place the napkin on the table if you need to step away before the end of the meal.
Common Napkin Etiquette Mistakes
It’s easy to make napkin mistakes, so let’s review some key ones to avoid:
Using Your Napkin Too Often
Don’t use your napkin after every bite or sip. Only use it occasionally to lightly dab your mouth. Frequent napkin use looks messy and anxious.
Rubbing Your Mouth
Rubbing the napkin across your mouth is considered rude. Always dab lightly instead. Rubbing suggests you are a sloppy eater.
Placing Back in Your Lap
Once your napkin has been used during the meal, place it on the table or plate rather than back in your lap. Refolding a dirty napkin and placing in your lap is unhygienic.
Using Discolored Sections
If your napkin becomes stained or discolored during use, fold it to expose a clean area. Don’t continue using a visibly soiled section.
Leaving It Messily on the Table
Don’t just toss your used napkin aside at the end of the meal. Place it neatly to the left of your plate before leaving the table.
Special Situations
Certain dining situations call for additional napkin etiquette considerations:
Outdoor Dining
When dining al fresco, keep your napkin on your lap as much as possible. Avoid placing it on the outdoor table, where it can blow away or get soiled. Weigh it down with your utensils if needed.
Beverages Only
Having just drinks or coffee? It’s fine to place your napkin on the table since you aren’t eating. Just be sure to use a coaster under your beverage glass.
Napkin Rings
If cloth napkins are preset with rings, leave the ring on your left until after the meal. Slide it off neatly to your left before using your napkin.
Reusing Napkins
For informal family meals, it’s generally fine to reuse paper or cloth napkins. Simply replace it in the ring or refold between meals. But use clean napkins for guests.
Teaching Children Proper Napkin Etiquette
It’s important to teach napkin etiquette to children early on:
- Have them practice placing their napkin on their lap at home.
- Gently remind them not to play with or crunch their napkin.
- Show by example how to neatly use, fold, and place napkins.
- Applaud any efforts to use their napkin properly.
With patience and consistency, children can learn proper napkin manners. Just keep napkin rules simple and appropriate to their age.
Conclusions
Key Takeaways
The key takeaways about proper napkin etiquette include:
- Never use it as a tissue, towel, or tablecloth.
- Gently dab, don’t wipe or rub, your mouth.
- Use clean sections as needed by folding it.
- Place used napkins neatly on the table, not back in your lap.
- Teach children napkin etiquette from a young age.
Following these simple guidelines shows you have good manners and respect for your hosts and fellow guests. Napkin etiquette is easy when you know the basic do’s and don’ts. With practice, using a napkin properly will become second nature.
The Purpose of Napkin Etiquette
Beyond basic manners, proper napkin etiquette serves important purposes:
- Keeps you neat and tidy while eating.
- Signals respect for hosts, guests, and the overall dining experience.
- Allows you to focus on conversation and enjoyment of the food.
- Lets you demonstrate class and knowledge of formal customs.
Knowing how to use a napkin correctly gives you confidence in any dining situation. It shows care for your appearance and regard for those dining with you. Mastering napkin etiquette is a small but meaningful part of being well-mannered.