Being “very thick” with someone refers to having an extremely close friendship or relationship. It means being loyal, trusting, and deeply connected on an emotional level. When two people are very thick, they tell each other everything, support each other completely, and feel like family.
How close of a bond is it?
Being very thick is more than just being good friends or even best friends. It goes beyond normal friendship into an unbreakable bond. Some key signs that indicate two people are very thick include:
- Knowing each other extremely well
- Being able to rely on each other for anything
- Regularly spending lots of time together
- Sharing thoughts, feelings, and secrets
- Having no boundaries or privacy from each other
- Going above and beyond to help and support each other
When you’re very thick with someone, your lives are deeply intertwined. You share everything and can be completely open and vulnerable with each other. The level of comfort, trust, and intimacy is very high.
How does it develop?
Being very thick with someone usually develops over many years. It takes time to build up the closeness and history required. Some ways this strong bond can form include:
- Being childhood friends
- Going through major life events together like school, marriage, parenthood, etc.
- Sharing secrets and building trust over time
- Supporting each other through difficult times like deaths, divorce, job loss, etc.
- Making lots of memories together through travel, activities, traditions
- Having an unspoken connection and understanding
The more shared experiences, quality time spent together, and mutual support there is, the more likely two people will become very thick. It’s not something that happens overnight. The depth of the relationship is built up over many years.
What are some examples?
There are many examples of people who are very thick in real life and fiction:
- Childhood best friends who are inseparable for life
- Siblings who remain extremely close into adulthood
- War buddies who have saved each other’s lives
- A married couple together for decades who know each other inside and out
- Two teachers who have taught at the same school their whole careers
- Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, and Hermione Granger
- Frodo Baggins and Samwise Gamgee in Lord of the Rings
- Mitch and Cam on Modern Family
- Turk and J.D. on Scrubs
- Meredith and Christina on Grey’s Anatomy
In each case, the characters or people demonstrate an extremely close, loyal relationship from going through so much together over time. Their lives are very intertwined both emotionally and logistically.
What are the benefits?
There are many advantages that come with being very thick with someone:
- Having unconditional support no matter what
- Feeling secure and comfortable to be yourself
- Having someone who deeply understands you
- Never feeling lonely with your best friend by your side
- Building amazing memories and experiences together
- Having someone you can count on 100%
- Sharing all your thoughts, dreams, fears without judgment
- Growing and evolving together over time
- Making big decisions and achieving goals together
The depth of the relationship provides stability, security, support, and belonging. You know your “person” always has your back.
What are the potential downsides?
However, there can also be some disadvantages or challenges with being very thick with someone:
- Dependency – relying too much on each other
- Loss of own identity – shaped too much by the other person
- Seeing things only from their perspective
- Letting them impact your other relationships
- Feeling obligated to spend time together
- Getting too involved in each other’s problems
- Potential jealousy or possessiveness
- Pain if you ever grow apart or have a falling out
It’s important for both people to retain a sense of self and set healthy boundaries. Communication and maturity help avoid pitfalls.
Can you be very thick with multiple people?
It is possible but rare to have the very thick bond with more than one person. Some examples include:
- Siblings who are equally close
- Best friends since early childhood who are now like family
- Members of a band/group that have been together for decades
- Close coworkers who have worked together for 30+ years
Even then, there is usually a primary person who you are closest with and share absolutely everything. Most people can only manage the demands of one very thick relationship. Spreading it across multiple people can dilute the closeness.
Can you become very thick later in life?
While childhood and growing up together facilitates becoming very thick, it’s not impossible to develop this closeness as adults. Examples include:
- Military members deployed together in high stress situations
- Going through serious illness/treatment together
- Meeting your soulmate/partner later in life
- Becoming step-siblings or in-laws as adults
- Forging a parent-child bond through adoption
Shared traumatic or emotional experiences can accelerate relationship bonding. But in general, it still takes years to build up the necessary trust and understanding. The later in life, the harder it is to become truly very thick.
Can you be too thick with someone?
Yes, it is possible for two people to become overly enmeshed and dependent on each other. Some signs of being too thick include:
- Spending every single day together for months/years
- Never doing anything without the other person
- Obsessive sharing of details and updates
- Feeling lost and incomplete when apart
- Dropping all other friends/relationships
- Making huge life decisions only together
Healthy very thick relationships still involve having some separate interests, friends, and time apart. If the relationship becomes all-encompassing and isolated, it can be detrimental. Boundaries and balance are important.
Conclusion
Being very thick with someone represents an unbreakable lifetime bond built on trust, experiences, and support over many years. While being very thick offers tremendous benefits, it also requires maturity and some separation to avoid becoming overly dependent. True very thick relationships are rare; most people have just a few, if any, over the course of a lifetime. This special closeness should be treasured and cared for when found.