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How do you tell if a man isn’t physically attracted to you?

Physical attraction is an important part of romantic relationships. However, it can sometimes be difficult to tell if your partner is as physically attracted to you as you are to them. Here are some signs that a man may not be that into you physically.

He rarely compliments your appearance

One of the most obvious signs a man isn’t attracted to you is that he rarely compliments your appearance. Men who are into you will go out of their way to compliment you – both in private and around others. If your partner used to compliment you often but has stopped, it could be a red flag that his physical attraction has waned.

He doesn’t initiate physical contact

Men who are very attracted to their partners tend to initiate frequent physical contact, such as touching, hugging and kissing. If your partner never reaches out to hold your hand, puts their arm around you or gives you a kiss on the cheek, it may be because they don’t feel that magnetism towards you. Now, some men just aren’t as physically affectionate as others by nature, so you have to take their personality into account. But a definite decrease in a man’s drive to touch you could signify a lack of physical chemistry.

Sex has decreased

One of the biggest indicators a man isn’t into you physically like he used to be is if the frequency of your sex life has taken a downturn. When men are very attracted to someone, they typically want to have sex with them often. If your intimate encounters have dropped off significantly, it could mean your partner’s eyes are wandering elsewhere. There are other factors that can affect libido like stress or medications, so you’ll have to evaluate other signs too.

He doesn’t act jealous or territorial

Most men have a bit of a jealous/territorial streak when they know other men are interested in their partner. If you get hit on in public or talk about a male friend or coworker, does your partner seem totally unfazed? If so, it could be because he isn’t that invested in keeping you to himself. Men who are super into you physically often act possessive because they can’t stand the thought of losing you.

He prefers watching porn to intimacy with you

If your partner seems to show more enthusiasm for watching porn than sleeping with you, it may be because he isn’t that physically attracted to you. Now, some men just have higher libidos and watch a lot of porn in general. But if your sex life is suffering and you catch him secretly watching porn instead, it could be a sign that he is mentally replacing you with the visual stimuli. This hurts, but is something you should address directly with him.

He no longer lights up when you walk in the room

When a man is really into a woman, she literally lights up a room in his eyes. When you walk in, his face is likely to break into a smile, his eyes light up and he stares at you admiringly. If you notice your partner no longer reacts this way when laying eyes on you, it could mean the intense physical attraction he first felt has started to fade.

He doesn’t get jealous of other men

Most men have a bit of a jealous/territorial streak when they know other men are interested in their partner. If you get hit on in public or talk about a male friend or coworker, does your partner seem totally unfazed? If so, it could be because he isn’t that invested in keeping you to himself. Men who are super into you physically often act possessive because they can’t stand the thought of losing you.

He rarely looks you in the eye anymore

Men who are passionately attracted to someone will hold their gaze intently when talking to them. If your man has stopped maintaining eye contact with you, it could betray a lack of interest and attraction. Now, some people just aren’t big on eye contact overall or may be trying not to stare at certain body parts. But frequently looking away while you’re speaking is usually not a great sign.

He doesn’t go out of his way to impress you anymore

Men who are trying to win over someone they’re attracted to will often go the extra mile to impress them. This could mean getting dressed up, planning fun dates or buying gifts. But if your partner has stopped putting in that extra effort and just does the bare minimum, he may not be trying that hard to “get” you anymore. And that’s often a sign of fading attraction.

You don’t catch him sneaking peeks at you

A man who is really into you physically will have a hard time keeping his eyes off you, even after you’ve been together for years. You’ll often catch him sneaking glances at your body when you aren’t looking. If you’ve noticed your guy no longer stealing appreciative peeks, it could mean he isn’t as visually drawn to you anymore.

He doesn’t talk about your appearance with friends/family

A man who is truly into you will sing your praises when you aren’t around. If you’ve noticed he no longer brags about how beautiful, hot or cute you are to others, it could be because those thoughts aren’t front and center in his mind anymore. And for many men, physical attraction fuels those types of comments.

He doesn’t buy you sexy gifts

Some men express attraction by buying gifts with a sexy twist – lingerie, sensual massage oil, spa trips. If your partner used to buy you intimate little surprises but has stopped, it may be because he’s no longer trying to stoke the sexual fire between you.

He doesn’t talk about your future together

When men see a woman as a long-term partner, they usually don’t hesitate to talk about the future and make plans. If your guy used to mention future vacations or dream about your future family but doesn’t anymore, it could be a sign his level of attraction has changed. He may see you as more of a companion now rather than a passionate partner.

He doesn’t seem to really listen when you talk

Part of attraction is genuinely listening to your partner and being interested in what they have to say. When your conversations become one-sided because your man doesn’t ask follow-up questions or remember details, it may be because he’s not truly engaged. And for many men, that lack of interest stems from not being as attracted anymore.

He doesn’t want to post photos of you on social media

While not all men are into blasting their love life all over social media, many still enjoy sharing cute pics with their partner when they’re super into them. If your guy never wants to post photos of you anymore, or worse – stops tagging you or crops you out, he may be trying to send the message that he’s no longer into you.

He seems bored when you have sex

Great sex stems from strong physical attraction between partners. If your intimate encounters have started to feel routine, he seems bored or distracted, or he appears to just be going through the motions, it could be because he’s no longer feeling that strong magnetism. Great sex requires great chemistry, so a fizzle usually means the spark is dying out.

He doesn’t introduce you to people anymore

When a man is totally into his partner, he wants to show her off and introduce her to new people in his life. If your partner now drags his feet when it comes to bringing you around his friends, family or coworkers, it could be because he’s not excited to tell others about you. And usually, a drop in attraction fuels this waning enthusiasm.

Your gut tells you something is off

Lastly, don’t ignore your instincts. Women often have a sixth sense when something is off in their relationship. If your gut is telling you your partner’s physical interest has waned, pay attention. Even if there are no obvious flags, subtle signs and shifts in energy don’t lie. Trust that little inner voice.

How to boost physical attraction in your relationship

If you’ve noticed some of the above signs in your own relationship, don’t panic – there are many ways to get the spark back.

Strategy How it helps
Have more fun together Laughter and thrill-seeking increase attraction chemicals like dopamine and oxytocin.
Try new things in the bedroom Novelty triggers the reward centers in the brain, upping attraction.
Compliment him more Flattery boosts his confidence, making him feel more desirable.
Initiate intimacy more often Being forward can spark his desire and show you want him.
Touch him playfully more Playful caresses release bonding hormones and get him thinking sexual thoughts.
Text him flirty messages Flirty communication makes him feel wanted and stirs anticipation.
Dress up for date nights Looking hot grabs his attention and reminds him of your desirability.
Work out together Getting those endorphins flowing together breeds attraction.
Have one-on-one time Uninterrupted time together increases emotional closeness.
Act confidently Confidence is sexy and alluring.

When to be concerned about lack of attraction

It’s normal for attraction to fluctuate in a long-term relationship. However, if your partner shows little interest in reigniting physical chemistry, it could signal bigger issues. Ongoing lack of attraction may indicate:

  • High relationship conflict
  • Poor communication
  • Built-up resentment
  • Infidelity
  • Emotional disconnection
  • Depression or low testosterone

Don’t hesitate to seek couples counseling if physical attraction doesn’t improve after honest communication with your partner. Lack of chemistry often has roots in psychological or medical issues requiring professional support.

Conclusion

Feeling physically desired by your partner is hugely important for relationship fulfillment and intimacy. If you see the signs your man’s attraction is waning, address things proactively together. With mutual understanding and effort, there are many ways to get steamy chemistry back on track. Attraction ebbs and flows in any romance, so have faith yours can be reignited with a little creativity, playfulness and patience.