What is a psychopath?
A psychopath is someone who has an antisocial personality disorder, which means they are callous, manipulative, and lack empathy. Psychopaths only care about themselves and have no regard for the feelings of others. They can seem charming on the surface, but are secretly narcissistic and self-serving. Some key traits of psychopaths include:
- Lack of guilt or remorse
- Lying and manipulation
- Reckless behavior
- Lack of empathy
- Shallow emotions
Not all psychopaths are criminals, but many end up in prison because of their antisocial behaviors. About 1% of the general population meets the criteria for psychopathy, with higher rates found among incarcerated criminals. Psychopathy is not easily treated, as psychopaths rarely seek help on their own and traditional talk therapy does not work well with them.
How to tell if someone is a psychopath
It can be difficult to spot a psychopath if you don’t know the signs. Here are some red flags to watch out for:
They seem too good to be true
Psychopaths are skilled at putting on a mask and charming people. They know what to say and how to make a good first impression. You may feel like you just met the perfect partner or friend, even though you don’t know them that well yet. This is a tactic psychopaths use to draw people in and gain their trust.
They lie and manipulate
While anyone can tell a lie, psychopaths are pathological liars. They spin tales and fabricate entire stories with no remorse. Even when caught in a lie, a psychopath will shift the blame and avoid taking responsibility. Psychopaths manipulate people for their own gain with no consideration of the pain and damage inflicted on others.
They lack empathy
One of the hallmark signs of a psychopath is a complete lack of empathy and inability to care about others’ feelings. They will say and do hurtful things without blinking an eye. You may pour your heart out to them about a difficulty you’re going through and get coldness in return. A non-psychopath would feel and express empathy towards you.
They show shallow emotions
Psychopaths are not able to experience emotions deeply like most other people. They can pretend to be happy, sad, or loving, but it’s merely an act. Their displays of emotion are typically shallow or exaggerated in an attempt to mimic normal reactions. Real feelings of love, joy, or remorse are foreign concepts to them.
They have a grandiose sense of self
Despite their shallow emotions, psychopaths consider themselves superior to others in many aspects. They overestimate their own abilities and intelligence while looking down on others. Even when proven wrong, a psychopath will rarely accept responsibility or admit fault. They have an inflated and grandiose view of themselves.
They are impulsive and irresponsible
Psychopaths act on impulses and urges without considering consequences. They live in the moment and often engage in reckless behavior like substance abuse, gambling, dangerous driving, or criminal acts. They show extremely poor judgment and don’t take responsibilities seriously. Jobs and relationships fall apart due to their impulsiveness and failure to follow through.
They have a parasitic lifestyle
Psychopaths tend to live off others while contributing little themselves. They feel entitled to special treatment and exceptions from normal rules and obligations. They have no issues mooching money, housing, or favors off of family, romantic partners, friends, or co-workers with no intention of repayment. Hard work and earning their own keep isn’t a priority.
They are compulsive pathological liars
As mentioned previously, psychopaths are prolific liars. They make up stories, fabricate experiences, and even create false personas. When caught in a lie, they express no shame or remorse. For a psychopath, lying is like breathing – it comes naturally and feels normal to them. They lie for a variety of reasons: to manipulate people, get attention, avoid consequences, or simply out of boredom. Expecting truth or sincerity from a psychopath is futile.
They are controlling and possessive in relationships
Because they view others as objects to be used, psychopaths try to dominate and control the people in their lives. In romantic partnerships they seek to control who their partner sees and what they do. They bombard lovers with texts and phone calls and become enraged if they don’t respond immediately. Psychopaths often isolate their partners from family and friends. Their excessive jealousy, manipulation, and explosive anger make maintaining healthy relationships impossible.
They lack realistic life goals
Psychopaths tend to drift through life without clear goals, purpose or direction. Or if they do have ambitions, they are unrealistic grandiose fantasies. Their poor impulse control and inability to delay gratification or work hard makes achieving success highly unlikely. Many psychopaths end up in prison or homeless after burning every bridge due to their destructive lifestyle. They fail to learn from these experiences.
How are psychopaths created?
Research shows that psychopathy likely stems from a complex combination of genetic predisposition and environmental factors. Brain scans reveal that the areas controlling emotions and judgment functions differently in psychopaths. Early studies on twins separated at birth provide more evidence for a genetic basis. But genetics alone do not create a psychopath – other factors contribute to the perfect storm. Childhood trauma, abuse, poor parenting, and unstable home environments are thought to play a role in sculpting a callous, uncaring psychopathic personality. Some theories suggest that damage to certain areas of the brain could also result in lack of empathy and remorse found in psychopathy. The causes are still not fully understood and continue to be studied.
Can you have a relationship with a psychopath?
In short – no. Attempting an intimate relationship with a psychopath will inevitably lead to emotional and psychological devastation. Their inability to genuinely connect, empathize, or care makes true intimacy impossible. Their need for control, manipulation, pathological lying, infidelity, and sometimes even violence or criminality make for an unhealthy and toxic dynamic that should be avoided at all costs. A relationship with a psychopath means accepting emotional crumbs, constant chaos, and always being last on their priority list.
While psychopaths can certainly put on an act and feign loving behaviors in the beginning, it’s simply a ploy to achieve their selfish agendas. Once they have their partner emotionally invested through love bombing and mirroring, their mask will slip and the exploitation begins. The caring romantic partner is replaced by a cold, selfish user.
For self-preservation, those who find themselves entangled with a psychopath should seek professional support and safely exit the relationship. With likely past trauma of their own, survivors should seek therapy to process the emotional damage and regain their self-worth. Healing is possible, but only once fully removed from the psychopath’s harmful grasp.
How to interact safely with a psychopath
If you must interact with a psychopath regularly, such as a co-worker or distant relative, take steps to protect yourself:
- Avoid being vulnerable or sharing too much personal information, as they will exploit weaknesses.
- Do not take anything they say at face value. Verify facts.
- Keep interactions brief, polite, and shallow.
- Set firm boundaries.
- Document everything in case you need evidence of inappropriate behavior later.
- Never confront them alone.
- Keep conversations witnessed by others.
- Report threats, aggression, or illegal acts.
Essentially, keep the psychopath at arm’s length, guard your privacy, and involve others as much as possible when dealing with them. Avoid wishful thinking that you may get through to them or elicit empathy. Protect yourself and those you care about first and foremost.
Are all psychopaths dangerous criminals?
No. While psychopaths make up a disproportionate amount of the incarcerated criminal population, not all psychopaths engage in violence or outright criminal behavior. Psychopathy falls on a spectrum. On one end are criminals like serial killers, con artists, and rapists – the sort depicted in Hollywood thrillers.
However, many psychopaths integrate into society and adopt more socially acceptable behaviors. They become ruthless CEOs, lawyers, or politicians who lack morals but stop short of lawlessness. Some researchers refer to them as “successful psychopaths.” They take advantage of people in more subtle or even legal ways, like embezzlement, adultery, and cutthroat corporate ladder climbing.
So keep in mind, a psychopath may not necessarily look like the murderous villains of TV and movies. They may simply be that charismatic and ambitious, yet oddly cold boss, co-worker or acquaintance who gives you the chills. Trust your gut instincts if someone seems “off” in their lack of empathy, sincerity or ethics. While not all psychopaths will stab you in the back figuratively or literally, it pays to be cautious.
Famous Historical Figures Believed to be Psychopaths
While impossible to diagnose posthumously, many historians and mental health experts believe these prominent figures in history exhibited strong psychopathic traits:
| Name | Occupation | Traits |
|---|---|---|
| Adolf Hitler | Dictator | Grandiosity, lack of empathy and remorse, aggression. |
| Ted Bundy | Serial killer | Pathological lying, manipulation, promiscuity, violence. |
| Frank Abagnale | Con artist | Pathological lying, manipulation, irresponsibility, lack of remorse. |
| Queen Mary I | Monarch | Lack of empathy, cold-heartedness, rage, vengefulness. |
| Jim Jones | Cult leader | Charisma, manipulation, erratic behavior, aggression. |
This list illustrates how psychopathy manifests across a spectrum of behaviors, not all of which lead to murder or crime. Cunning psychopaths can achieve positions of power, with devastating impacts on society.
Fictional Psychopaths in Movies and TV
Psychopaths are common villains and antagonists in thrilling fiction. Here are some of the most notorious psychopath characters.
| Character | Movie/Show | Psychopathic Traits |
|---|---|---|
| Hannibal Lecter | Silence of the Lambs | Lack of empathy, cunning manipulation, violence. |
| Norman Bates | Psycho | Violent mood swings, deception, dissociation. |
| Patrick Bateman | American Psycho | Shallow emotions, lack of empathy, secret murderous acts. |
| Cersei Lannister | Game of Thrones | Vindictiveness, ruthlessness, manipulation tactics. |
| The Joker | The Dark Knight | Reckless behavior, aggression, sadism. |
These exaggerated ominous characters showcase the most terrifying traits of psychopathy. They provide insights into the disturbed psychology of psychopaths through memorable, yet chilling performances.
Conclusion
In summary, several signs may indicate whether you have encountered a true psychopath. Lacking in empathy, sincerity, ethics and remorse, they charm and manipulate others for selfish gains. While not all psychopaths are criminals, they leave emotional wreckage in their wake through lies, control, and exploitation. Protect yourself by setting firm boundaries, being wary of grandiose claims, and never blindly trusting their facade. Share cautionary tales and what you’ve learned with loved ones to avoid the heartache of becoming involved with a psychopath.