Falling in love can be an exhilarating, confusing, blissful and sometimes scary experience. When you start developing feelings for someone, you may wonder if what you’re feeling is really love or just a passing infatuation. Knowing the difference between love and lust can help give you clarity when navigating new romantic relationships. While there’s no absolute foolproof way to know if you truly love someone, there are several key signs that indicate your feelings likely go beyond a surface-level crush or attraction. Paying attention to these signs can help reveal when a relationship has the potential to turn into a lasting, committed partnership built on real love.
Do you feel emotionally connected?
One of the hallmarks of falling in love with someone is feeling emotionally close to them. This means you feel comfortable opening up to them, expressing your fears and desires, and trusting them with your vulnerabilities. You don’t feel the need to pretend you’re someone you’re not when you’re together. Instead, you feel safe, supported and fully accepted for who you are.
Some signs you may feel an emotional connection with someone include:
- You can share anything with them without feeling judged.
- You feel completely comfortable being yourself around them.
- Your conversations flow easily and you never run out of things to talk about.
- You make each other laugh and can be silly together.
- You trust their advice and input about important life decisions.
- You support each other through difficult times and share both joyful and painful experiences.
Experiencing this sense of emotional intimacy is often one of the first indicators that your feelings may be turning into love rather than just a passing crush.
Do you feel positively about their flaws?
When you’re falling for someone, you become able to embrace their imperfections and quirks. Rather than being turned off by their flaws, you find their whole package makes them perfectly lovable to you. You don’t want to change them or criticize their weaknesses. You feel able to take the good with the bad and Value who they are as a complete human being.
Signs you can embrace someone’s flaws as part of who they are include:
- You think their quirky habits are cute rather than annoying.
- You don’t get irritated when they do things differently than you would.
- You don’t criticize small things about their appearance or character.
- You can gently address their areas for growth without judgment.
- You recognize their limitations but don’t try to change them.
- You still feel attracted to them after seeing all their human imperfections.
Having this level of acceptance is a good indicator your feelings go beyond infatuation and see the real person behind your romanticized perceptions.
Do you make compromises to stay close?
When two people are falling in love, they become willing to compromise certain things in order to keep the harmony of the relationship. Rather than insisting on getting your way, you work to find solutions that satisfy both partners. For example, you might alternate picking movie selections or find a mutually agreeable restaurant when you have different cuisine preferences.
Signs you’re willing to compromise to maintain your closeness include:
- Taking turns choosing activities or making decisions.
- Combining aspects of your different preferences.
- Ceding on issues that are less important to you.
- Making an effort to try things your partner enjoys.
- Reaching middle ground when you have differing needs.
- Talking through disagreements rather than arguing.
Approaching conflicts in a spirit of compromise rather than stubbornness can be an indicator that keeping your connection is your priority over minor preferences.
Do you care deeply about their happiness?
When you start to develop loving feelings for someone, you begin to care about their health, well-being and happiness at almost the same level as your own. You want to be a source of joy in their life and go out of your way to do thoughtful things for them. Their needs and desires become as important to you as your own.
Signs you care deeply about someone’s well-being include:
- You make an effort to do little things to brighten their day.
- You want to understand their goals, fears and dreams.
- You cheer them on sincerely during their accomplishments.
- You offer comfort and support when they’re struggling.
- You try to nurture their physical, mental and emotional health.
- Their happiness makes you truly happy too.
Having this sense of care and investment in someone else’s fulfillment can indicate you see them as an extension of yourself and your life.
Do you miss them when apart?
As romantic feelings deepen into love, you start to miss your partner profoundly when you’re not together. You may find yourself looking forward to the next time you can see them and daydreaming about them throughout the day. Even small separations can leave you eager for reunions, and long separations may feel unbearable.
Signs you miss someone when apart include:
- Counting down the minutes or days until you see them again.
- Feeling sad when apart for long periods of time.
- Spending time imagining what you’ll do together next.
- Staying in frequent contact through calls, texts and letters.
- Having trouble fully enjoying yourself without them there.
- Feeling their absence acutely and longing for their presence.
Missing someone powerfully in their absence can signify your lives feel interconnected and you yearn to share everyday experiences.
Do you make them a priority?
As you begin to build a life with someone, they become one of your top priorities. You arrange your schedule around quality time with them. You look for ways to share more experiences together. Your major life decisions start to involve consideration of them and their needs.
Signs someone is a priority in your life include:
- Putting time with them over other obligations when possible.
- Including them in your important life events.
- Making efforts to get to know their family and friends.
- Compromising on career moves or living situations to stay together.
- Considering them when making large purchases or other financial decisions.
- Valuing their input and wishes when making plans.
Elevating someone to a priority in your decisions, commitments and time investments can signal they are becoming an essential part of your life’s trajectory.
Do you have fun together?
While loving relationships also involve supporting each other through hardships, having fun together is an important ingredient. Sharing laughs, adventurous excursions and lighthearted everyday moments can kindle and sustain romantic feelings.
Signs you genuinely enjoy someone’s company include:
- Time flies quickly when you’re together.
- You laugh frequently in each other’s presence.
- You engage in playful teasing and silliness.
- You enjoy exploring new places and activities.
- You can relax and be yourselves without pretense.
- You feel uplifted by your interactions.
Having this sense of fun and ease with someone indicates your spirits lift in their presence. You take delight in each other on a day-to-day basis.
Do you have long-term vision?
Falling in love often involves picturing a future together with your partner. You begin to think in terms of “we” instead of just “me.” Making plans far off in the future feels natural, comfortable and exciting. You can easily imagine still being together years down the road.
Signs you envision a long-term future with someone include:
- Fantasizing about experiences you’ll share years from now.
- Making faraway plans like vacations, home purchases or retirement.
- Considering what they’ll be like as you both grow old.
- Imagining ways you’ll support each other’s evolving goals.
- Feeling certain you want them in your life indefinitely.
- Sensing they’ll still feel like home no matter how much time passes.
Seeing someone as a permanent fixture in your life and plans can indicate you feel intrinsically bonded and can’t imagine life without them.
Do you feel unusually attracted?
Falling in love involves an intense physical draw toward someone as well as emotional connection. You likely feel mesmerized by their physical appearance, mannerisms, voice and scent. This feels heightened beyond a typical physical attraction. You crave their affectionate touch and may feel “butterflies” in their presence even after months or years.
Unusual signs of attraction include:
- Getting lost in their eyes, smile or other features.
- Feeling irresistibly drawn to kiss, touch and be close to them.
- Tingling with excitement when you know you’ll see them.
- Having your heart race or stomach flutter when you receive affection.
- Feeling weak in the knees if you see them interacting with others.
- Being very keyed into their subtle mannerisms and quirks.
Ongoing intense physical attraction beyond the honeymoon phase can signify strong bonding hormones and a sense of addictive passion.
Do you feel loyal?
An important sign of true love is feeling devoted to someone beyond fleeting emotions or outside circumstances. You guard the relationship above your passing desires or urges. Your commitment comes from a deep sense they are family and home to you.
Signs of loyalty and devotion include:
- Standing by them during times of hardship.
- Defending the relationship if concerned friends or family criticize.
- Having no interest in romantic prospects besides them.
- Feeling totally devoted after years together.
- Sensing your fates feel intertwined and bound.
- Believing they are worth weathering all of life’s storms.
Experiencing this bone-deep sense of dedication to someone signifies your bond transcends temporary challenges or trials.
Do you feel at peace?
One of the most telling signs of being truly in love is an overall sense of peace, happiness and completeness the relationship brings you. You feel secure, comforted and whole rather than anxiety-ridden and conflicted. Your partner feels like home.
Signs you feel peaceful include:
- Feeling relaxed, content and centered when together.
- Experiencing a sense of wholeness in their presence.
- Gaining an overall increased sense of happiness.
- Feeling your time together replenishes you.
- Gaining confidence in yourself from their steadfast love.
- Sensing your life feels right when they’re in it.
This core sense of peace and certainty can be one of the strongest indicators you have developed a deep, quiet and lasting love.
Conclusion
Real, lasting love involves more than just an exciting infatuation or intoxicating lust. While those feelings may come and go, true love runs deeper than ephemeral emotions. When you experience a profound sense of connection to someone that makes them feel intrinsic to who you are, it likely signifies a loving bond has formed. The happiness, dedication, intimacy and peace you find in their presence can confirm your feelings go beyond a surface attraction. Paying attention to these signals can help give clarity to when an ordinary crush has turned into a once-in-a-lifetime love.