Narcissism is a complex personality trait that involves an inflated sense of self-importance, a need for excessive admiration, and a lack of empathy. The core characteristic of narcissism is the belief that one is special and superior to others. So in a fundamental way, the answer is yes – narcissists do tend to believe they are superior. However, the reasons behind this belief and how it manifests can vary.
The Link Between Narcissism and Perceived Superiority
Several key aspects of narcissism are linked to beliefs of superiority:
- Grandiose sense of self-importance – Narcissists have an exaggerated sense of their own abilities and inflated self-views. They truly believe they are more intelligent, attractive, talented or important than others.
- Sense of entitlement – Their inflated self-views lead narcissists to expect preferential treatment and constant admiration from others. They believe they deserve special privileges and adherence to a different set of rules.
- Arrogance – Because they believe they are special, narcissists often act arrogant and haughty. They act in a superior, dominant manner towards others they see as beneath them.
- Lack of empathy – Their sense of superiority leads narcissists to be dismissive of others’ perspectives and feelings. They show an inability to understand how others feel.
This constellation of traits and behaviors flows directly from narcissists’ core belief that they are superior beings.
Narcissists Need External Validation
Although narcissists truly believe in their own superiority, they actually have an underlying insecurity and fragile self-esteem. Their inflated self-views mask deep wells of shame, vulnerability and low self-worth.
This is why narcissists constantly seek validation from others. They need continual affirmation of their supposed talents or attractiveness to reassure themselves.
Narcissists’ belief in their superiority requires constant maintenance. It is often contingent on validation from the outside world rather than true inner confidence.
How Their Perceived Superiority Manifests
Narcissists’ belief in their own superiority manifests in various interpersonal behaviors:
- Dominance/intimidation – They relate to others in a domineering, aggressive manner, seeking to control people and outcomes.
- Attention-seeking – They constantly fish for compliments or draw attention to themselves. Their sense of superiority demands constant reaffirmation.
- Haughtiness – They often act disdainful, bored or contemptuous towards others. Their posture, tone and language convey their belief in their elevated status.
- Lack of courtesy – They feel entitled to preferential treatment, so they skip social graces, niceties and courtesy rituals that are beneath them.
- Lack of gratitude – They expect favors and assume others will cater to them, so freely given help is not received graciously.
These behaviors betray narcissists’ inflated self-views and sense of entitlement as special, superior beings.
Domain-specific Superiority
Interestingly, narcissists do not necessarily believe they are superior to others in all domains. A narcissistic CEO may see himself as a visionary business leader yet be completely dismissive of his musical talents.
Narcissists’ sense of superiority can be centered around specific domains linked to insecure childhood experiences. These often relate to intelligence, attractiveness or power.
So a narcissistic belief in one’s superior intelligence does not necessarily extend to a sense of physical superiority. Narcissists’ perceived superiority derives from their particular psychological needs and childhood wounds.
Delusions of Grandeur
In extreme cases, narcissists’ belief in their superiority can cross over into delusions of grandeur – fixed, irrational beliefs about their status, power or special abilities that lack any basis in reality.
For example, a narcissist may genuinely believe they have a genius IQ on the basis of flimsy evidence or that they will rise to become CEO or President without any actual qualifications or leadership experience to justify this belief.
These fixed delusions reflect the extent to which narcissists’ sense of superiority departs from objective facts and rationality.
Cognitive Distortions That Reinforce Superiority
Narcissists rely on various thought distortions or cognitive biases that reinforce their belief in their superiority, such as:
- Black-and-white thinking – They categorize people as either competitors or inferiors. There is no middle ground or nuance.
- Jumping to conclusions – They assume they are the most skilled or brilliant without any objective evidence.
- Magnification/minimization – They magnify their own strengths and accomplishments while minimizing their flaws and failures.
- Projection – They ascribe their own flaws to others and believe everyone else is as arrogant and lacking in empathy as they are.
These thought distortions allow narcissists to maintain inflated self-perceptions even in the face of contradictory evidence.
The Roots of Their Perceived Superiority
So where does this belief in their superiority come from? Many experts point to childhood experiences as shaping narcissists’ self-views:
- Lack of parental warmth/affirmation – Insufficient praise and affection in childhood may drive narcissists to seek affirmation of their worth from others.
- Harsh criticism or abuse – Narcissism may arise as an over-compensation for abusive or hypercritical parenting that crushed their self-esteem.
- Perfectionism – Narcissistic parents who demand perfection and impress impossible standards on their children may lead them to internalize this same pathological need to be perfect and superior.
- Overindulgence – Excessive parental pampering and praise, especially when children are raised as special or superior, seeds later narcissism.
Their perceived superiority arises as either a defense or internalization of childhood experiences with caregivers. It either compensates for or reflects their upbringing.
The Paradox of Secret Insecurity
Despite their overt grandiosity, narcissists often harbor secret insecurities about their worth and abilities. They doubt themselves and worry about failure and criticism despite their arrogant external behavior.
In a strange paradox, the front of superiority they project masks deep internal self-doubt and fragility. Their perceived superiority is more house of cards than solid foundation.
Pathological Lying to Support Superiority
In order to present themselves as superior, narcissists often resort to pathological lying. They fabricate accomplishments, exaggerate their IQ or misrepresent their status or power.
These lies are intended as self-bolstering fantasies to prop up their belief in their superiority, which is so crucial to their self-image.
Relationships as Platforms for Superiority
Narcissists view relationships as platforms to assert their superiority and elevate their status. Partners, friends and children are all potential mirrors the narcissists can gaze into to affirm their inflated self-views and egos.
Relationships are based on an inherent imbalance, with the narcissist seeing themselves as the more intelligent, accomplished, attractive or important partner. This superiority dynamic undermines true intimacy.
Superiority as Defense Against Shame
Beneath their bravado, narcissists feel a constant nagging sense of inadequacy and shame. Their perceived superiority serves as a defense, distracting both themselves and others from these insecurities.
By acting arrogant and boastful, narcissists keep vulnerable feelings of defectiveness at bay and project an image of confidence and strength.
Cognitive Dissonance When Superiority Is Threatened
Narcissists suffer from overwhelming cognitive dissonance whenever their perceived superiority is brought into question. They pathologically lash out at criticism, no matter how small or innocuous, because it threatens their fragile self-image.
Objective feedback is processed as a deep, destabilizing attack. This is why narcissists respond with such fury and venom to perceived slights and critiques.
Projection of Their Superiority Onto Others
Narcissists have difficulty seeing others accurately, instead projecting their own traits onto them. They assume others are similarly obsessed with status, power and superiority.
So narcissists will see others as arrogant braggarts precisely because that is how they themselves behave. Projection shields them from uncomfortable truths about themselves.
Selective Social Comparisons to Maintain Superiority
To prop up their inflated self-views, narcissists selectively choose people to compare themselves to. They compare upward to people clearly superior to establish lofty aspirations.
More often, they compare downward to people they view as beneath them in attractiveness, power, status or success. These comparisons allow them to derive a sense of superiority.
Superiority as Leverage in Manipulation
Narcissists leverage their perceived superiority in their habitual manipulation of others. They present themselves as authoritative, more worldly, experienced or insightful to influence people’s behaviors and perceptions.
Establishing superiority allows them to dominate conversations, elicit admiration and blind followers to their agendas.
Superiority Within Narcissistic Abuse Dynamics
The narcissist’s perceived superiority plays a key role in the abuse dynamics that unfold in their relationships. Their inflated sense of self-importance drives entitlement, a lack of empathy for others’ needs and contempt for their partners’ perspectives.
Their grandiose self-image sets the stage for the idealization-devaluation cycle narcissists subject romantic partners to. It also fuels their sense of justification when engaging in infidelity, aggression or emotional manipulation tactics.
Gender Differences in Expressions of Superiority
Narcissism manifests in culturally-bound ways tied to gender roles. Narcissistic men tend to emphasize power, sexual prowess, status and independence as realms of superiority. Narcissistic women are more likely to highlight perceived superior attractiveness and charm.
So male narcissists may see themselves as dominant patriarchs whereas female narcissists operate as divas expecting constant flattery and tribute.
Superiority as Illusion of Control
Viewing themselves as superior allows narcissists to feel a sense of control over their lives. In reality, they often feel empty, insecure and helpless underneath their bravado.
Their inflated self-image compensates for underlying feelings of having little control over their lives or destinies that threaten to overwhelm them.
Do All Narcissists Believe They Are Superior?
The belief in superiority is a core characteristic of narcissism in general. However, individual narcissists differ in terms of:
- How their perceived superiority manifests or the specific domains it centers around
- How rigorously they defend their sense of superiority against perceived threats
- The extent to which their self-views drift into delusional thinking
- How much their narcissism overlaps with or camouflages underlying feelings of self-doubt and insecurity
So while all narcissists fundamentally believe they are above others, how this belief operates can vary based on the individual’s psychology, context and defense mechanisms.
In Conclusion
A sense of superiority lies at the heart of narcissism. Narcissists believe they are more intelligent, attractive, important or accomplished than others. This inflated self-image drives their need for validation, fragile self-esteem, lack of empathy, domineering behaviors and tendency to exploit relationships.
However, narcissists rely on distortion, projection, lying and selective comparison to protect their belief in their superiority. Underneath they harbor secret insecurities fueling their boasting and grandiosity. Their perceived superiority is necessary for their disordered personalities but often departs from reality in troubling ways.