Do guys like older girls?

This is a question that many girls find themselves wondering as they get older. There is often an assumption that guys prefer to date younger girls, but is this actually true? Do guys have an issue dating older women or are they open to it? Here we will explore the facts around whether guys do actually like older girls.

The Science Behind Attraction

Research has shown that on a biological level, men and women are often attracted to certain traits in the opposite sex. For men, signs of youth and fertility tend to be desirable, which is why you often see men attracted to characteristics like smooth skin, shiny hair, high voices, and a trim figure. These are all indicators of youth and good health. Since women’s fertility declines with age, there is some natural bias for men to seek out younger mates. However, science shows this isn’t the whole story.

While biology does play a role, research shows that social and cultural factors also heavily influence what men find attractive. Studies have found that men’s preferences change over time as social norms change. When women over 30 were rare in the workforce, men tended to view them as less desirable. Now that more women work and marry later, norms have shifted. Men today do not view a 30 year old woman as “over the hill.” With the women’s rights movement, ideas of what is beautiful and attractive have evolved.

Additionally, science shows that men prioritize more than just looks and fertility when selecting a long-term partner. Traits like intelligence, confidence, success, compatibility and emotional maturity become more important in relationships that move beyond the short term. Since these traits do not decline with age, it shows that older women can be highly desirable partners.

Do Men Have an Age Limit?

While men do tend to be most attracted to women in their early 20s when considering looks alone, most do not actually have a strict age limit when it comes to dating. Surveys show the majority of heterosexual men are open to relationships with older women if they find the right connection. Let’s look at the evidence:

A survey by dating site Whatsgoodly found 80% of men in their 20s were open to dating cougars (defined as women 35+).
An AARP survey of singles over 40 found 34% of men preferred dating older women compared to just 20% who only wanted younger.
Data from dating sites shows men tend to search for partners around their own age, without strong preferences for youth.

This data indicates most men are not setting strict age limits for a relationship, assuming they click well with the person. While they may notice youthful beauty in their 20s, they are open to relationships with women well into their 30s, 40s and beyond.

Do Age Gaps Matter to Men?

Related to the age limit question is whether a significant age gap matters to men when dating older women. An age gap of 10 or 20 years was once very taboo, but these norms have shifted over time. Let’s look at male attitudes towards age gaps today:

A Today.com survey found 2/3 of men were open to dating up to 10 years older.

A poll by Prevention found over 60% would date someone more than 5 years older.
Dating sites have seen significant rises in younger men seeking out older women.

While very large age gaps (20+ years) are still relatively rare, medium gaps are becoming more acceptable. Many men are comfortable dating women 5, 10, or even 15 years older if the connection feels right otherwise.

Do Men Prefer Younger or Older Women?

While men are open to dating older women, do they actually prefer younger or older? The evidence shows men have pretty even openness to both:

A study in BMC Psychology found while men found 20 year olds most attractive, their own age was almost as desirable.
OkCupid data shows men tend to search for women around their own age, not drastically younger.

A survey by dating app Once found over 70% of men were open to a relationship with either a younger or older woman.

The data indicates men do not strongly prefer either younger or older – they look for partners around their age. While youth has aesthetic appeal, men seem to prioritize compatibility. This benefits older women.

Do Younger Guys Like Older Women?

Now let’s look specifically at younger men – say under 35. Are they open to dating older women? Research shows many are very open to it:

The Whatsgoodly survey found 80% of men in their 20s were open to dating cougars.
A study by University of Wales Institute found over 60% of men in their 20s have been attracted to women over 40.
Data from dating sites indicates younger men actively seek out older women on the apps.

While stereotypes suggest young guys only want young girls, the truth is many younger men are attracted to confidence, experience, and stability in older partners. Large portions seek out cougar relationships.

Do Teenage Guys Like Older Girls?

What about high school aged guys – do they show interest in older girls? Teen relationships have their own complex dynamics. But surveys show many teen guys do like older girls:

A survey of over 5,000 teens by NBC News found 33% of high school boys preferred dating a senior to someone their own age.

Seventeen magazine surveys of teen boys have found over half are attracted to women college-age or above.
Data from dating apps and sites show teenage boys seeking older women partners.

While peer relationships are still common, many teen boys report attraction to the confidence and maturity of older females. This interest can translate to high school couples with 1-3 year age gaps.

Do Age Gaps Work Long-Term?

Research shows men are open to age gap relationships with older women. But do these relationships actually work long term? Here is what studies show:

A study in the Journal of Family Issues found wide age gap relationships were just as satisfied as similar-age ones in the long run.
Couples with age gaps of 10+ years had similar relationship stability according to a study in the Journal of Population Economics.

A 2020 study found no difference in relationship quality for age gaps under 10-15 years.

While very large gaps do come with challenges, relationships with 5-15 year age differences do not appear to be less satisfying or stable based on research. This bodes well for older women dating younger men long term.

Why Men Like Older Women

Now that we’ve established men do seek out older women for relationships, let’s dive into why this pairing is so intriguing for them. Here are some of the top reasons men give for liking older women:

Maturity – Older women tend to have greater maturity and less drama. This straightforward communication is appealing.
Stability – Financially secure and stable lifestyle is attractive to men seeking serious relationships.
Confidence – The self-confidence of an older woman is a turn on for younger guys.

Independence – Not needing to be “taken care of” is refreshing to men.
Experience – Sexual experience of an older woman can be exciting for a younger guy.

Rather than seeing age as a negative, men view the rich life experience of older women as a quality. They find their confidence and straightforward communication appealing.

Do Guys Care About Skin and Body With Age?

For heterosexual men, physical appearance does matter when it comes to attraction. As women get older, changes in skin, body and appearance are inevitable. Do these physical changes deter men from older women?

The evidence shows most men are not overly deterred by natural signs of aging, when viewing women as whole packages:

A Today survey found 80% of men were strongly or somewhat attracted to women with wrinkles.

96% of men in an AskMen survey said weight gain would not be a dealbreaker in a relationship.
Over 90% of men in a Psychology of Women Quarterly study said gray hair did not affect a woman’s allure.

While extreme weight and aging differences can challenge attraction, most men are accepting of normal changes over time when they connect on other levels.

Do Guys Care If a Woman Can Bear Children?

Related to aging, some women worry men will be turned off if they are past childbearing years. So, does fertility impact desire?

Surveys show most men do not view fertility as a prerequisite for dating. For example:

An AARP study found over 75% of midlife men were open to dating women who could not have biological children.

Dating site surveys show the majority of younger men interested in older women are not looking to start families.
Only 25% of men under 35 in a Match.com survey said fertility issues were a dealbreaker.

While a small portion of men do prioritize having biological kids, most focus on overall connection. Women beyond childbearing years date and marry often.

Do Guys Like Short or Tall Women?

Height is another area women worry about, but does it make or break attraction? Here is what research reveals:

A study in Personality and Individual Differences found while men view average female height (5’4″ – 5’7″) as most attractive, few had strict cutoffs.
71% of men surveyed were open to dating women taller than them in a Match.com poll.

Only 25% said height was a dealbreaker in a survey published in Gender Issues.

While ideal heights vary, surveys show the majority of men are quite open to dating both taller and shorter women.

Warning Signs When Dating Younger Men

While many men do genuinely seek loving relationships with older women, it’s important to look out for some warning signs. Watch for:

Younger men who primarily text versus call and make real conversation.
Hesitation to be seen together socially with an older woman.
Reluctance to introduce an older woman to family and friends.

Unwillingness to commit and build a life together.

True intentions become most clear over the first 6 months of dating. Take it slowly and watch for consistency between words and actions.

How to Meet Younger Guys

Older women interested in connecting with younger men have plenty of options:

Dating sites and apps with filters like eHarmony and Match.
Cougar-specific apps and sites like CougarLife.
In-person meetups through groups like Cougar Meetup.

Through hobbies and activities you enjoy like sports leagues.
Coffee shops, restaurants, concerts, networking mixers, and more.

You can certainly take the lead and contact men directly online. But also leverage your existing social networks and be active at events you enjoy to meet organically.

Are There Lesbian Cougar Relationships?

Older women dating younger men is often discussed in the context of heterosexual couples. But what about lesbian women? Research shows many lesbian cougar relationships also exist:

20% of single lesbians over 40 were open to dating women at least 10 years younger in a Match.com survey.
14% of lesbians had a partner more than 10 years younger versus just 5% with an older partner according to UCLA data.

Cougar-specific dating platforms have large numbers of lesbian women seeking younger partners.

While less studied, significant numbers of lesbian women also date younger same-sex partners. Some prefer the vibrancy and stamina of a younger woman.

Are Cougar Relationships Just Sexual?

A common assumption about older women dating younger men is that these relationships are mostly about sex while the couple “has fun”. But are cougar relationships just sexual flings?

Research indicates older women date younger men for meaningful relationships just like any other pairing:

A University of Maine study found a majority of women were seeking long-term commitment not casual hookups with younger men.
70% of couples with 5+ year age gaps were monogamous according to Canadian research.

Only 15% of women saw younger men as sexual conquests per a review in Marriage & Family Review.

While assumptions persist, studies show most older women seeking younger men are interested in committed relationships. Sexual capability or prowess does not appear to be the main driver.

Do Age Gap Relationships Withstand the Test of Time?

Can large age gap relationships stand the test of time? Here is how they stack up:

Only 8% of marriages have age gaps of 10 years or more according to Census data.
The divorce rate was higher for gaps of 10+ years in a study of 3,000 couples.
However, couples with 5-9 year age gaps had no greater chance of divorce.

Very large gaps do pose challenges and come with higher divorce rates. But relationships with moderate 5-10 year gaps appear to go the distance on par with similar-age couples.

Do Men View Older Women as “Cougars”?

Does the term “cougar” negatively impact older women dating younger men today? Let’s examine how younger guys view the term:

An AARP survey found only 28% of men over 45 had negative views of the “cougar” label.

Research in the Journal of Aging Studies found younger men were empowered by the term, not turned off.
Men often use the term positively to mean an attractive, confident older woman.

While sometimes still mocking, research shows most younger men today do not view the “cougar” label as a turn off when dating older women. The negative connotations have softened over time.

Common Concerns About Dating Younger Guys

Here are some common worries older women express when considering younger men as partners:

Will it Last?

Some women worry the younger man will leave when she gets old or will want children. However, research shows younger men who choose older partners are committed for the long haul. These couples discuss children early on to ensure alignment.

Is it Socially Acceptable?

While very large age gaps were once taboo, 5-10 year age differences are now socially acceptable to most. Family may need time to adjust, but focus on shared values and compatibility above age.

Will We Relate?

Some women fear conversing with a much younger man. But younger men are often drawn to the sophistication and life experience of older women. Let conversations flow naturally and pursue common interests.

Am I Too Old for Sex?

Many older women worry they are too old for sex. But women’s sexuality spans well into later decades of life. Stay confident, communicate needs, and you will share a robust intimate life.

Will He Want Kids?

Some younger men do ultimately want biological kids. However, many are open to adoption, step-kids, or accepting childlessness for the right relationship. Discuss this early to ensure alignment.

Conclusion

In summary, research resoundingly shows that most younger men are open to dating older women and view them as desirable partners. While extreme age gaps of 20+ years do remain socially taboo, 5-15 year differences are seen as quite normal. Older women bring maturity, confidence, and straightforward communication to relationships that younger guys find appealing. For older women seeking younger men, the data indicates there are many opportunities worth exploring.