Quick Answer
There is no legal requirement for a woman to take her husband’s surname upon marriage. Traditionally, women have often taken their husband’s last name, but it is becoming more common for women to keep their maiden name or use a hyphenated surname. The choice of whether to change surnames upon marriage is a personal decision for each couple to make.
Can You Legally Keep Your Maiden Name When You Get Married?
Yes, there is no legal requirement for a woman to change her surname when she gets married. It is completely legal for a woman to keep her maiden name after marriage if she chooses.
Some of the reasons a woman may opt to keep her maiden name include:
– Wanting to maintain their professional identity if they have already established a career under their maiden name. This is especially common for women in fields like academia, writing, medicine, etc.
– Not wanting the hassle of changing their name on all legal documents, licenses, bank accounts, etc.
– Maintaining a connection to their family and heritage by keeping the surname they were born with.
– Preferring how their maiden name sounds over their married name.
– Not wanting to have a different surname than their children if they already have kids from a previous relationship.
– Simply liking their maiden name and wanting to keep it.
Legally, there is no issue with keeping your maiden name after marriage. It is a matter of personal choice and more women are opting to keep their birth name. You would simply need to indicate on your marriage certificate that you intend to keep using your maiden name after marriage.
What are the Pros and Cons of Taking Your Husband’s Surname?
Pros
– Having the same last name can signify you are now a family unit.
– It can be easier dealing with things like medical insurance, taxes, bills etc. in the same surname.
– Any future children will automatically have the same last name as both parents.
– Traditions and expectations may make taking the husband’s last name seem like the norm.
– It may be important to your husband that you share a surname.
Cons
– Loss of your identity and professional reputation attached to your maiden name.
– The hassle of changing your name on all legal, financial and official documents.
– Not sharing a surname with your children from a previous relationship.
– Potential conflict with your family about no longer having the same last name.
– Giving up a surname that may hold importance to your heritage.
– Feeling like you are conforming to an outdated patriarchal tradition.
What Name Options Do You Have?
Here are some common options for married names:
- Keep your maiden name
- Take your husband’s last name
- Hyphenate – use both surnames joined with a hyphen
- Use your maiden name professionally and husband’s name legally/socially
- Create a new surname by combining elements of each your names
- Have your husband take your surname instead
There are no legal restrictions – it is entirely up to each couple to decide what works best for them.
How Do You Change Your Name After Marriage?
The process for changing your name depends on where you live, but typically involves:
- Getting a certified copy of your marriage certificate.
- Changing your name on Social Security records.
- Updating your driver’s license and passport.
- Notifying your bank, creditors, insurance companies etc.
- Changing professional licenses, memberships etc.
Some key points:
– You must show proof of marriage to change to your married name.
– You can continue using documents in your maiden name until they expire.
– Name change on financial accounts may require you to close and re-open accounts.
– Update your will, trusts, power of attorney etc. to reflect new name.
– Notify relevant government agencies like the tax office, voter registration etc.
It can be a lengthy process so be sure to give yourself plenty of time and patience. Most institutions will work with you to make the transition to your new name as smooth as possible.
What If You Have Kids Already?
If you already have children from a previous relationship, there are a few options:
– Keep your maiden name to have the same surname as your kids.
– Hyphenate your name to include your maiden name and married name.
– Legally change your children’s names also to match your new married name.
– Your husband takes your maiden name so the whole family matches.
– Choose a whole new surname for your family.
The most important factors are ensuring your children don’t feel excluded and minimizing administrative hassles with things like school records, health insurance etc. Speak with your children and co-parent to find the best solution for your blended family.
Can You Use Your Husband’s First Name as Your Last Name?
There is nothing legally preventing you from taking your husband’s first name as your new surname. For example, if he is John Smith you could become Jane Smith.
Some considerations:
– Will your husband be okay with you using his first name as your last name? Make sure to discuss it.
– It may cause confusion professionally if you publish under a surname that doesn’t obviously belong to you.
– Be conscious of how it may impact any children who may prefer to all share the same surname.
– Ensure you follow the proper legal name change process in your state.
While unconventional, there are no rules saying you can’t adopt your spouse’s first name as your surname if you want to! It’s your name and your choice.
What Questions Should I Ask My Fiance When Choosing a Surname?
Before making a decision on your married name, here are some helpful questions to ask your fiance:
– How strongly do you feel about us sharing a surname?
– Would you be willing to take my surname instead of me taking yours?
– If I keep my maiden name, how can we create a sense of family identity?
– Do we want any future children to have your surname, mine, or hyphenate both names?
– Is using a completely new surname something we should consider?
– If I change my name, are you willing to help me with the transition like updating records, cards etc.?
– Will you be supportive if I choose to keep my maiden name professionally?
– How can we compromise if we disagree on changing names?
– Do either of our surnames hold special meaning for our families?
Discussing these concerns respectfully and finding compromises will help you make the best choice together about your shared married name. Listen to each other’s perspectives and be flexible.
Conclusion
While there is a tradition of women taking their husband’s surnames upon marriage, the choice comes down to each couple’s personal preferences. There are many options for married names from keeping your own, creating a new name, or having your husband take your name instead. Weigh the pros and cons thoughtfully. Most importantly, ensure you and your spouse communicate openly and respect one another’s feelings when making the decision. Laws allow you to use virtually any surname you want – but talk it through as partners to determine what feels right for your marriage.