Anxiety is a common condition that affects millions of people. While anxiety can seem like it comes out of nowhere, there are often triggers that set it off. One question that comes up is whether someone else’s behavior can trigger anxiety in another person.
What is anxiety?
Anxiety is a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease. It can range from mild to severe. Some common symptoms include:
- Increased heart rate
- Shortness of breath
- Sweating
- Trembling or shaking
- Feeling tense
- Having trouble concentrating
- Trouble sleeping
- Avoiding certain situations or things
Anxiety becomes a disorder when these feelings occur without any real threat or danger and start to interfere with daily activities. There are several types of anxiety disorders, including generalized anxiety disorder, social anxiety, phobias, and panic disorder.
Common triggers for anxiety
For many people with anxiety, there are specific triggers that tend to set off symptoms or make them worse. Common triggers include:
- Stress – This can be from work, school, relationships, finances or other sources
- Trauma – Past traumatic experiences like abuse, assault, accidents, etc.
- Medical conditions – Some conditions like thyroid disease can contribute to anxiety
- Medication – Certain medications, herbal remedies, and drugs can trigger anxiety as a side effect
- Caffeine
- Alcohol and hangovers
- Lack of sleep
- Big life changes – Like starting a new job, getting married, having a baby, etc.
In many cases, anxiety is triggered by the perception of threat or danger, whether real or imagined. As a result, our brains kick into fight-or-flight mode, which leads to the anxious thoughts and feelings.
Can someone else’s behavior trigger your anxiety?
The short answer is yes, someone else’s behavior can trigger anxiety in another person under certain circumstances. Here are some examples of how this can occur:
- Criticism – Being frequently criticized, especially in a harsh manner, can lead to increased anxiety and self-doubt.
- Controlling or manipulative behavior – If someone is very controlling or manipulative in a relationship, it can create a constant feeling of walking on eggshells.
- Unpredictability – Dealing with someone who acts very erratically or has frequent, unpredictable mood swings can be anxiety-provoking.
- Violence – Living with domestic violence or abuse understandably leads to very high anxiety levels.
- Bullying – Being the target of bullying causes situational anxiety, especially in younger people.
- High-pressure environments – Workplaces or families with very high demands and little support can trigger anxiety.
- Gaslighting – When someone distorts the truth and denies your reality, it can create self-doubt and anxiety.
Often, it is not one single behavior, but an overall pattern of behavior that contributes to anxiety. Additionally, some people are more predisposed to anxiety and may betriggered by behaviors that wouldn’t bother someone else as much. The closer the relationship, the greater the impact as well.
How relationships can contribute to anxiety
Human beings are wired to connect with others. Relationships play a major role in our emotional health. Difficult or abusive relationships often undermine mental wellbeing and create anxiety. Here are some examples:
Lack of emotional support
Feeling alone and unsupported during difficult times can worsen anxiety. Without reassurance and care from loved ones, people can feel isolated. This perceived lack of support triggers the fight-or-flight response.
Unhealthy communication patterns
Things like criticism, defensiveness, contempt, and stonewalling are toxic communication habits. They create an unsafe emotional environment that leads to higher anxiety. Healthy communication promotes understanding and reduces anxiety.
Betrayal of trust
When someone betrays our trust through infidelity, dishonesty, or breaking important promises, it damages both the relationship and our sense of security. Losing that safe attachment can set off anxiety alarms.
Controlling or abusive behavior
When someone is highly manipulative, possessive, puts you down, or tries to isolate you from others, the sense of threat is immense. This generates constant high anxiety and fear while in the relationship.
Walking on eggshells
If someone has frequent angry outbursts or mood swings, you may feel like you have to walk on eggshells around them to avoid setting them off. This creates a persistent feeling of danger and hypervigilance – prime conditions for anxiety.
Power struggles
Ongoing power struggles in a relationship erode trust and create anxiety about asserting needs. There is a heightened sense that one misstep could lead to conflict or consequences from the other person.
In these scenarios, the other person’s behavior acts as a form of emotional and mental abuse. The constant stress and unpredictability make the body feel like it is under chronic threat, leading to exhausted, overwhelmed, and anxious feelings.
Tips for coping when someone triggers your anxiety
It can be very challenging when someone else’s behavior causes excessive anxiety. Here are some tips that may help:
- Talk to the person if possible. Communicate how their actions affect you and ask for specific changes.
- Set healthy boundaries and limits on unacceptable conduct.
- Get support from others – friends, family, support groups, or a counselor.
- Make time for self-care to manage stress levels – relaxation techniques, exercise, nourishing food, etc.
- Challenge anxious thinking patterns through CBT techniques.
- Find an outlet like journaling or art to process your feelings.
- If needed, limit contact or end unhealthy relationships.
- Medication and therapy for anxiety issues if they persist and disrupt daily life.
It’s important to trust your feelings – if someone in your life is worsening your mental health, take steps to address it. Anxiety becomes unhealthy when it stops you from living your life fully. Seek help to make positive changes.
When to seek professional help
It’s normal to feel anxious sometimes when dealing with difficult situations and relationships. However, if anxiety persists for weeks and starts impacting your ability to function, it may be time to seek professional help. Signs that anxiety may be outside the normal range include:
- Panic attacks that seem to occur out of nowhere
- Feeling anxious most days
- Worrying excessively about many different things
- Trouble sleeping due to anxiety
- Not participating in activities you previously enjoyed
- Problems concentrating at work or school
- Irritability or nervousness around other people
- Using drugs, alcohol or other unhealthy coping methods
A psychologist or counselor can work with you to determine if anxiety is reaching a diagnosable level. Therapy, medication, or other treatment may help manage debilitating anxiety and get your life back on track.
Conclusion
In conclusion, someone else’s behavior certainly can trigger or worsen anxiety in another person. Abusive relationships, manipulation, betrayal of trust, and other conduct can generate immense stress. However, there are many ways to cope with relationship-driven anxiety and restore wellbeing. With the right help and support, you can take back control and minimize anxiety’s impact on your life.