Yes, nuns are generally allowed to stay in contact with their families after joining a religious order. However, the amount of contact permitted can vary depending on the specific rules of their order. Some key points about nuns communicating with family members:
Letters and Phone Calls
Most orders allow nuns to exchange letters or phone calls with immediate family members. However, contact is usually limited to family members only. The frequency may be restricted as well – some orders only permit contact on special occasions or holidays. The goal is to avoid distractions from spiritual duties.
Visits
Many orders do permit occasional family visits, though visitation policies differ. Cloistered orders that emphasize solitude and contemplation tend to have stricter limits on visits. Some may only allow family to visit in designated areas at appointed times. More open orders often provide rooms for family members to stay overnight on visits.
Contact During Formation
Contact with family is most restricted during initial formation. New postulants and novices may have little to no contact during this transitional period that typically lasts 1-2 years. This allows time to adjust to religious life away from outside influences. Contact gradually increases over time as vows are taken.
Emergency Contact
Most orders do allow nuns to be notified of serious family emergencies, such as a death or life-threatening illness. Temporary exceptions for additional contact may be made on a case-by-case basis during family crises.
Rules and Regulations by Order
Rules for a nun’s communication with family members depend heavily on the specific religious order they join. Some examples:
Poor Clares
This contemplative Franciscan order has very strict limitations on family contact. Sisters may only receive 1-2 brief visits per year in the parlor. Communication is only by letter except in emergencies.
Dominican Nuns
Dominican nuns can receive more frequent visits from family, about once per month. However, they must speak to visitors behind a grille rather than face-to-face. Families can also attend profession ceremonies.
Sisters of Mercy
This active order has fairly open policies for family contact. Sisters are allowed to visit, write, and call family regularly. Visits may occur in private rooms without barriers.
Missionaries of Charity
Founded by Mother Teresa, this order discourages outside contact including family in order to focus fully on serving the poorest of the poor. Communication is limited to only a few times per year.
Benedictine Sisters
Benedictine nuns follow the ancient Rule of St. Benedict, which supports welcoming family guests to the monastery. Sisters may visit with close relatives more freely, though still within guidelines.
Special Occasions for Contact
Even cloistered orders tend to make rare exceptions for nuns to visit with family for certain special occasions:
- Clothing Ceremony: When first receiving the habit
- Profession Ceremony: Taking final vows
- Jubilee Anniversaries: Milestones like 25th or 50th year of vows
- Family Weddings: With prior permission from the order
- Funerals: For immediate family members
- Grave Illness: Of a close relative
These are infrequent but important events when a nun may be granted permission to leave the monastery temporarily and visit family in person, even if contact is normally restricted.
Ongoing Family Relationships
While family contact is limited for nuns, most do maintain close bonds and distribute news through permitted means. Existing family relationships continue, though the nun’s religious duties take priority.
Ways nuns may continue family relationships:
- Remembering family through prayer
- Sending letters or cards
- Keeping family photos in their cell
- Praying for deceased relatives
- Making handicrafts as gifts for family
- Bringing family members to religious ceremonies
- Visiting ill or dying family
- Attending rare family events with permission
So in summary, nuns are generally able to preserve family bonds despite their cloistered life through limited, regulated contact. Their vocation calls them to a new religious family, yet most orders still permit nurturing natural family ties as well.
Conclusion
While nuns dedicate their lives fully to God and religious service, most Roman Catholic orders do allow for some ongoing communication with immediate family members. Contact is restricted compared to lay life and tailored to suit each order’s spiritual focus. But visits, letters, and phone calls enable nuns to maintain family relationships to a degree. Rare exceptions may even be made for a nun to attend important life events. With permission, nuns can balance their primary vocation with remaining devoted daughters, sisters, and aunts.