Parenting styles have long been a topic of interest for researchers studying child development. In particular, how strict or authoritarian parenting impacts children has been debated. While strict parenting certainly has some benefits like teaching obedience and respect, it may also have costs like increasing a child’s risk for depression. In this article, we’ll review what the research says about the potential links between strict parenting and depression in children.
What is strict parenting?
Strict parenting, also known as authoritarian parenting, is characterized by parents who have high expectations for obedience and compliance from their children. Strict parents tend to use more punishment, have more rules, and allow less open dialogue with their kids. Their discipline style is typically more absolute and forceful without much explanation or warmth.
Some key characteristics of strict parents include:
- High expectations for obedience and compliance
- Numerous and inflexible rules and boundaries
- Harsh discipline for misbehavior including yelling and corporal punishment
- Little open communication or autonomy granted to the child
- Low warmth, nurturance, and responsiveness to the child’s needs
The opposite parenting style is often called permissive or indulgent parenting which features very few demands and rules for children. Most experts recommend an authoritative style that balances expectations for maturity and cooperation in kids with warmth, communication, and respect for a child’s independence.
Does strict parenting increase depression risk?
Several studies have found connections between authoritarian or strict parenting and higher rates of depression in children. Here is a summary of some of the key research findings:
Less parental warmth
Research shows that low parental warmth and acceptance is associated with depressive symptoms in children. Strict parents tend to demonstrate less affection and sensitivity toward their children’s emotional needs. Feeling rejected by parents can negatively impact a child’s self-esteem and mood.
Harsh punishment
The use of harsh corporal punishment like spanking by strict parents has been linked to increased depression risk in offspring. Physical punishment teaches kids they cannot trust their parents to care for them safely which can damage the parent-child bond.
Suppression of emotions
Strict parents often discourage the expression of emotions like anger or sadness in children. However, suppressing emotions appears to increase depression severity over time. Placing high demands for emotional control on kids may undermine their ability to regulate their moods.
Feelings of rejection
Authoritarian parents who rule with an iron fist may leave children feeling rejected and disconnected from their parents. Rejection from parents is linked to higher depression levels in clinical research. Strict parenting emphasizes parental power over reciprocal bonds between parent and child.
Lack of autonomy
Because strict parents allow so little input or independence from the child, kids may feel helpless, incapable, and dependent. Research suggests that not providing children with chances to develop age-appropriate autonomy can contribute to later depression.
Negative attributional style
Strict parenting that focuses on criticism and shame can teach children to make internal, stable, and global attributions for failure. For example, believing they fail at everything or that challenges are unchangeable. This negative attributional style is strongly predictive of depression.
Are there any benefits to strict parenting?
While the bulk of research suggests there are risks associated with authoritarian parenting, there are likely some benefits to a stricter approach in moderation. Here are a few potential advantages:
More obedience
Strict parenting generally does result in children who follow parental rules better. Having to obey clear guidelines with consequences may provide kids with needed structure and discipline. However, taken too far this obedience may become compliance due to fear.
Less antisocial behavior
Some studies have found that authoritarian parenting reduces antisocial behavior like aggression, delinquency, and illegal drug use in children. Strict monitoring and consequences may deter rebellious acts. But harsh discipline tactics undermine internal motivation in kids.
More respect for authority
Strict parents place heavy emphasis on showing respect for authority figures. This may translate to children following teacher directions and adherence to laws better than kids from permissive households. But respect motivated by fear is quite different from respect motivated by care.
Higher achievement motivation
The high expectations of strict parents may drive some children to work harder academically in order to avoid parental disapproval. But research suggests this achievement motivation fueled by shame doesn’t work long-term.
So while strict parenting may have some benefits, experts tend to agree they come at a psychological cost to children compared to authoritative parenting approaches.
Does the impact of strict parenting depend on culture?
Some researchers have questioned whether the negative outcomes associated with strict parenting depend on cultural context. The degree to which authoritarian parenting is problematic may depend on whether it aligns with broader cultural values.
For instance, several studies have found the connection between harsh discipline and negative outcomes like depression is weaker in ethnic minority families. Strict parenting may not violate cultural norms as much for these families, so the impact on kids may not be as detrimental.
However, other researchers argue that while some detrimental effects of authoritarian parenting differ cross-culturally, there are many negative impacts that persist across cultures. For example, warmth and acceptance are important for children’s well-being in all cultural contexts.
Overall, strict parenting seems to carry risks across cultures. But the degree of harm likely depends in part on how much it violates cultural values regarding family relationships and dynamics.
What are some alternatives to strict parenting?
For parents considering adopting a less strict approach, several alternatives may provide benefits without compromising guidance and discipline for children. Some options include:
Authoritative parenting
This style balances setting reasonable expectations and boundaries with warmth, empathy, and respect for a child’s perspective. Discipline is focused on teaching, not punishment. Kids are given age-appropriate choices and input.
Positive parenting
This philosophy emphasizes nurturing strong bonds, modeling desired behaviors, using positive reinforcement, teaching social skills, and avoiding harsh punishments. Discipline involves natural consequences that help the child learn.
Gentle parenting
This approach focuses on teaching through understanding, compassion, and non-violence. Parents use empathy, active listening, and non-punitive methods like redirection. Anger and strong emotions are handled softly.
Unconditional parenting
This model prioritizes nurturing the parent-child bond over discipline and behavioral compliance. Kids’ feelings are validated, cooperation is elicited without coercion, and punishments are avoided.
While strict parenting can have some benefits, alternatives that provide both care and guidance may optimize child development and lower depression risk.
Conclusion
Research suggests that strict or authoritarian parenting approaches do appear to elevate children’s risk for developing depression. Strict parents tend to be low in warmth, highly critical, and use harsh disciplinary tactics like spanking which are all linked to increased depression. While strictness may result in more obedience and respect for authority, it comes at the cost of autonomy, self-esteem, and emotional regulation skills in children. Setting high expectations for kids is reasonable, but strict parents may emphasize obedience over nurturance and connection. Alternatives like authoritative and positive parenting can provide structure while maintaining reciprocal bonds between parents and children. Overall, research indicates that strictness alone makes for poorer mental health outcomes compared to approaches that balance discipline with love, empathy, and relationship repair.